Cauliflower Cheese Sauce

Listen. I'm firmly planted in the "foods are not other foods" camp. Avocado is not pudding. Bananas are not ice cream. Cauliflower is not rice / pizza / nachos (I needed a fainting couch after that last one).

Now, before you get all "some people have dietary restrictions!" on me, I know. I know that some people can't have regular pizza crust so cauliflower pizza crust is a great way for them to enjoy pizza. My problem is with the "eat cauliflower nachos Guilt! Free!" nonsense. Bitch, please. I eat all my nachos guilt-free. And if you watch the cauliflower nachos video (which I've done approximately 87 times because raaaaage) you'll see that the cauliflower nachos are topped with roughly thirteen pounds of cheese. Not so guilt-free if you think about it. Which I have. A lot.

Anyway. Not a fan.

Until last week. Last week I took the kids over to Vancouver Island to visit my aunt. Nothing makes you realize how little your kid will eat until you're in someone else's home, nixing every single food suggestion they have because you know your darling child will reject it. Ugh. My aunt had a secret weapon, though. She served Grady pasta with cheese sauce. He loved it. Cheesy pasta without the usual side of "crazy mom trying to push carrots and broccoli down my throat." This wasn't normal cheese sauce, though. It was cauliflower cheese sauce. Grady ate -and loved- a vegetable without arguing. Do I feel a little sneaky? Yes. Do I wish that my kid would just eat three square meals every day without fighting and negotiating? Absolutely. Will I let this stop me from sneaking vegetables into his food? NEWP.

So! If you have a vegetable-adverse eater (or if you want to eat cheese sauce Guilt! Free! *eyeroll*), this is the sauce for you.

Ingredients

1 head cauliflower
2 cups grated aged cheddar cheese (or regular, but the aged makes the sauce taste more cheesy)
1 cup of milk (give or take - depends on how thick you like your sauce and how big your cauliflower is)
1 heaped teaspoon mustard
1 Tablespoon Worcestershire Sauce
1 teaspoon salt

Directions

In a large pot, cook cauliflower in boiling water until fork tender.

Drain cauliflower and buzz with immersion blender until smooth.

Add cheese while the cauliflower is still hot so it melts nicely. Buzz with immersion blender until well mixed.

Add milk a little at a time, buzzing well with immersion blender (this is key! you don't want lumps) until you reach the desired consistency.

Mix in mustard, Worcestershire Sauce, and salt.

Makes approximately 8 cups of sauce. Freezes well.

Serve over pasta or steamed veggies or thin with a bit of milk or cream to make soup.

Revel in your genius.

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Summer Green Juice

This juice is summer sweet (there's nothing in the world quite like an Okanagan peach) but still nice and earthy from the kale. Earn extra smug hippie points if you make it whilst wearing a baby.

Ingredients

1 bunch dinosaur kale
1 peach
1 nectarine
1 lemon
1 lime
1/2 cucumber

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Directions

Feed ingredients through juicer. Your juicer may have suggested guidelines for the order in which you juice. For my masticating juicer, I like to do my leafy greens first followed by citrus, soft fruits and veg, ending with my hardest fruit or vegetable (usually apples or carrots). 

Serve over ice.

Makes two juices (quantity varies because of natural products).

Invisible

We'd had very little sleep the night before, and a few hours on the road in front of us, so after lunch I ducked into a coffee shop for the necessary caffeine while Shawn strapped the kids into their car seats.  It was the type of coffee shop with a twee name and mixed-medium art by a local artist hanging on the pristine white walls. The woman who made my drinks was (I guessed) in her early twenties and (I knew) impossibly beautiful.

I ordered our drinks and rolled my eyes at the $11 total ($11! For coffee! Get off my lawn!) and stood at the counter to wait. The guy behind me placed his order and stood chatting up the coffee goddess while she steamed milk and pulled shots. He was young and scruffy in that way that is supposed to look nonchalant but is actually very intentional. 

I stood waiting, invisible, as the young scruffy one told the young beautiful one about house parties and his band and something about a mutual friend and a hammock. She giggled at the appropriate places and coolly accepted an eager invitation to the next house party and managed to royally fuck up our drinks. 

We pulled away from the coffee shop and tried to agree on who would drink which drink. (They both tasted like melted ice cream.) I'll happily forfeit the killer eyeliner and the drunken ragers and the taut skin for my station wagon and babies but I'll be DAMNED if they try to take my coffee. 

It's an interesting thing to be invisible. It's not a bad thing, just a thing. I'm not a young one or a beautiful one or even an intentionally-scruffy one. I'm just me. And I love me. I love my wide hips that have birthed two babies. I love my stretch-marked breasts that make milk like it's their damn job (because it is their damn job!) to feed those babies. I love the scars that tell the story of beating cancer and the dark circles under my eyes that tell the story of my sleep-hating baby. 

My life is full and beautiful and enough. I don't mind being invisible. 

 

Meal Plan 08/15/2016 - 08/19/2016

The craziness of late summer has taken over and we've spent the last few weeks soaking up the sun and going on adventures and trying to squeeze every last drop of sunshine out of our days. The food we've been eating (and the dollars we've been spending on the food we've been eating!) has been slowly and steadily creeping away from "intentional" and into the free-for-all category. Time to get back on track!

Monday: something with tofu and vegetables (and complaints from Shawn) for Meatless Monday.

Tuesday: Smitten Kitchen's Nancy's Chopped Salad.

Wednesday: Barbecued cheese burgers with green salad.

Thursday: Mom's Mac & Cheese served with green juice.

Friday: Homemade pizza.

What are you eating this week?