Some Feelings and Some News

I've been that person who reacts to baby news with that uncomfortable twinge of happy/sad. I've felt genuine joy at the news that someone is expecting while simultaneously feeling that disconcerting tug of envy because whynotme? I've sincerely congratulated people on their pregnancy news while feeling envious. I've been excited and melancholy. At the same time.

It's complicated is what I'm saying.

I'm not saying pregnant couples shouldn't shout their news from the rooftops. Babies are exciting. Wanting a baby and then finding out you are lucky enough to get a baby is like winning the lottery. Shout it loud and proud. Celebrate. Be elated. Feel your feels.

But I'm not dismissing the heartache either. Wanting a baby with every fibre of your being and not getting a baby is devastating. Let yourself be disappointed. Don't deny your sadness. Feel your feels.

It's a fine line to walk between being excited about being pregnant and being sensitive to the many people who are experiencing the excruciating ache of not being pregnant. Which is kind of a longwinded way of saying that I am pregnant. And I'm elated. And I'm holding space in my heart for the people who are feeling happy/sad when they hear pregnancy news.    

A picture of our little peanut seven weeks ago. There's just 1! And it looks like it's supposed to! And has a heartbeat! 

A picture of our little peanut seven weeks ago. There's just 1! And it looks like it's supposed to! And has a heartbeat!