This is the way it works, right? Write about my newfound zen-like perspective and then get riled the fuck up over a cancer magazine called "Vim & Vigour"? I'm trying to be accepting of the process and not get all worked up over stupid shit like doctors who are late for appointments or who didn't order the correct blood work for the other doctor, which means the other doctor sends me for another blood test, which means I have had at least 1 blood test per week for the last month. I'm trying. And for the most part I'm succeeding. But then I'm given this magazine all about cancer and it's called "Vim & Vigour" and I just want to punch the person who came up with the name.
I mean, I get it. Calling the cancer magazine "Doom & Gloom" is bad form. And calling it "Fuck, This Really Sucks For You, Here, Have a Cookie" just isn't practical. But there has to be something better than "Vim & Vigour."
I have encountered a lot of false cheerfulness throughout this process. Which is fine, whatever, if you want to slap a big grin on your face and talk about how lucky I am to "only" have thyroid cancer (the Best! Cancer! Wheee!) because it makes you feel better, fine. Have at it. Don't let me (and MY feelings about MY cancer) get in your way. But don't start telling me how I "should" feel. Don't say that my lack of vim and/or vigour is me being negative. I'm not being negative. I'm just not doing a goddamn happy dance over the fact that I have the "good" cancer.
So. Cancer. Kind of a roller coaster.